Friday, February 03, 2006

I have a new, fake life. I scheduled a hair appointment with a different salon than usual so I wouldn't have to talk about the baby. I even took off my wedding ring in hopes of avoiding the marriage/children questions. The first thing she asks is how I've been spending my day. Am I supposed to be honest and tell her I started my day by visiting my baby's grave at the cemetery? I just told her I was taking it easy. Then she asked if I was married. Then she wanted to know how many kids I had. I didn't think I should tell her about the baby, but it feels like I am denying her existence! I feel dishonest. The stylist asked if I had any hobbies. By that time I felt totally deflated so I just told her I didn't. So she went into this story about how she saw an episode of A Baby Story when she was pregnant where a lady learned to crochet and made baby blankets. She told me she thought since she had the pregnancy hormones, she could do the same thing. This went on and on! I don't even know how to act in my fake life. I can't be rude to service people. I know they don't know any better.

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