Wednesday, January 31, 2007

3 Months

I can't believe Zaeden is already three months old. He is becoming so independent. He no longer likes to snuggle on a chest. He prefers to be on his back kicking toys or being shown books and things. He is doing much better soothing himself back to sleep by sucking on his hands. I can usually get at least one 4 hour stretch of sleep out of him each night. He sleeps more if he's had outings during the day.
Ivy is a wonderful helper. It is so great having a six year old around. She's always there when I need an emergency burp cloth or extra diaper. She's also very amused by stink, and there's a lot of stink around a baby!
I think I need to go to the cemetery today. I am feeling out of touch. The past seems so far behind me now. Sometimes I worry I will forget a whole year of my life. I am so focused on Zaeden, that I sometimes forget that he would never have been born if we hadn't lost little Cami.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

New Addiction

It didn't take me long to replace my discussion board addiction with an addiction to Second Life. I have been researching it for the potential use in education. While I'm not convinced it will work yet for educators, I do think it is the future of discussion boards. I have memberships in so many boards where there are women who hang out online posting all day. I think SL could provide a perfect outlet for that in a much more pleasant setting and with potential to make money. If you are already a member, my avatar is Mommy Mip. If you haven't tried it yet, create an account and tell them Mommy Mip sent you! It's free unless you want to own land, and then there are varying tiers of ownership.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Great Day!

We are off to a great start today. I had terrible nightmares about the baby last night, so I was glad to be awake. Brian was still asleep when the rest of us got up, so I thought I would make his coffee. I got the coffee started and put a Belgian waffle in the toaster oven for Ivy and stepped away. When the coffee maker beeped, Ivy and I both went into the kitchen to discover hot coffee pouring everywhere! I had not pushed the pot all the way in and the water overflowed the basket. There were coffee grounds everywhere and it was a disaster. Then I forgot about the waffle and Ivy noticed it was smoking. She ate it burnt anyway.

Monday, January 22, 2007

43 Things

I just discovered a new site. I was searching for "organize home office papers" and found this. Now how am I going to get more organized if I'm spending more time on their site? It's still pretty cool!

It's Going Great!

I feel a sense of freedom when I am not tied down to a discussion board waiting for a response or reaction to something I have posted. When I think of something to post on a board, I transfer my thoughts here and try to decide the best way to add the thought to my blog instead of a board. Too bad more people don't read this! I can spend more time promoting it after I get myself more organized.
This weekend I checked out my board 3 or 4 times a day and responded to a few posts. I resisted the other boards and really wasn't tempted. I think it is probably easier than I expected. Once I made the break, there wasn't really anything I had to go back and check. There are a few people I wonder about, but I can get by without checking.
On another note, I found a great sale at Osh Kosh this weekend, if anyone is interested. Winter clothes were 70% off. I got 14 items for the kids for under $100. Zaeden has jumped right from newborn size to 6-9 months! Ivy wears size 6 in the waist, but has short legs so it is pretty difficult to shop for her. So far the solution is to have her wear boots with a little bit of heel!

Friday, January 19, 2007

Toys We Love

We love this! It is so flexible. Right now it is hanging on his toybar over the play yard bassinet. He loves to kick it and grab the little purple bird.

Zaeden loves to kick this around. I have even put it inside his gown so it doesn't go too far when he kicks it.

Reality Check!

I have been participating in online communities for 15 years now. When I originally joined a local BBS in 1992, I was dialing in through a 2400 baud modem. It is hard to believe how quickly time has passed. After thousands of chats and discussion board postings, I have realized that I need to make some changes to my life. I am definitely addicted and here are some of the things that are bothering me:
  1. I am 40 pounds overweight and need to do something about it.
  2. I get angry at my husband for spending so much time playing WoW, but I spend quite a bit more time than he does just in my online discussion groups.
  3. My house is not nearly as clean as I would like it to be.
  4. I have the opportunity to work as many hours as I need, but I am only working about 10 hours per week.
  5. My brain thinks in terms of how I can turn my actions into a discussion board post. I am afraid of making decisions in real life based on what my online friends will think of me.

I should also note that things could be much worse. It doesn't interfere with my family life. I don't miss it when I am away from a computer. I don't get over involved in online drama. The main reason I am a member of these online groups is to provide support.

So with all this in mind, I am determined to cut back on my online discussion board time. I will mostly just visit the Mom Reality board because I feel a responsibility to continue to support those women. I am going to reclaim my life. I am not going to think about how my actions will look to someone online. I am going to get my housework done and lose this baby weight! I will also have more time to post to this blog and to get my children's sites up and running.

Wish me luck!

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Something New

It is a new year and things really feel new. I can't describe it well, but I feel like some burden has been lifted. I don't know if it is because it is a new year, because we passed the one year since our loss or just because I survived the holidays. I don't think about Cami's birth as frequently as I used to. Maybe it is simply because I put it all in writing.
Zaeden is doing great. He is so huge! I am working on his own web site at I will have his daddy do the blog once I get it set up. I experimented with some software called j-album, but I am not certain I will continue to use it. At last check, Z was over 12 pounds! Our neighbor stopped by yesterday and said he was the same size as her baby who was born two months earlier and a week overdue.
I have been trying to work from home, but it is difficult with the baby's feeding schedule. He eats pretty much all the time. We have had a few longer stretches of sleep in the last week and he's doing well falling asleep on his own when I put him down.
Ivy is so excited to be six and she is a great little helper. I don't know what I would do without her helping me out every day. I miss her when she's not here.
It is snowing right now. We have had some crazy weather this winter and I am really looking forward to spring. I hope to take Zaeden on the hiking trails we discovered near our home last year.