Thursday, July 05, 2007

Bizarre Flashbacks

We were at a party on Independence Day and I had to find a private room to nurse the baby. There was another mom there with a baby a few months younger than Zaeden. She asked what he was eating and I told her I was breastfeeding. She said, "Breast milk is best for them!"
I suddenly flashed back to when Ivy was Z's age and we had a Memorial Day party. There was another mom there with a baby a little younger than Ivy and she asked me what room I had designated for breastfeeding. At the time, I was offended. I was no longer nursing Ivy and this mom kept telling me I should be and that formula wasn't healthy. I looked at her scrawny baby and my healthy chubby baby and was offended. I left the party!
Not long after that, her baby died and I felt so much guilt over my actions. The original cause of death was listed as SIDS, but the autopsy proved it was pneumonia. They had taken her to the doctor many times and it just wasn't diagnosed. I think that experience is why I still don't feel like a "nursing mother." I still feel like I have to defend formula feeding, even though I have been nursing for almost 9 months.


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